Ever since I was saved in 1989, I’ve had a problem with a couple scriptures that talk about becoming less of ourselves and more like Jesus: taking up our cross and following him. (Matthew 10:38 and 16:24; Luke 9:23 and 14:27.)
I felt like I had to give up all my
dreams, stop using my talents and gifts, and turn into a replica of Jesus. Why
would God give me those dreams, talents, and gifts if He expected me to lay
them down and become just like Jesus?
I had struggled with this for so
long that I just quit doing anything for fear of doing the wrong thing: something
that wasn’t becoming like Jesus. That just served to make my anxiety over the
whole idea worse, because now I wasn’t doing anything to serve God. I wasn’t
becoming like Jesus; I wasn’t being myself either. I was hiding everything
about myself, including my faith, to keep from doing the wrong thing - which
was exactly the wrong thing to do.
Fast forward a bunch of years in which
I worked as a church secretary, taught kids on Wednesday nights, ran errands
for members, worked on projects with members and other staff. When I left that
job, I felt like my whole life ended. I never really felt like I was serving
God, until I wasn’t. I had been serving God by serving the people of His Church.
I just didn’t see it.
Then one day while reading a
devotional, I came across a verse. 1 John 4:8, of which the last line is…. God
is Love. A light went on in my heart.
That’s it! God is love! Can it get any simpler than that?
Jesus wasn’t telling us to literally
turn into him but to follow what he does, and Jesus loves. He is the
personification of the Love of God. He came to serve us by giving up his
physical life for our salvation. That is a cross we no longer carry. The cross
we are now required to carry is turning from everything that is not love and
striving to become the same Love that Jesus demonstrated for us.
God is love!
He wants to empty us
of all that is not love
so He can fill us with Himself!
