Respect Yourself

       

             One morning, as I drove to work, I came up behind an older vehicle going about 55 mph, the speed limit being 65 means I came up behind it rather quickly. I signaled and moved into the left lane to go around the small aging car. It was a dull red hatchback, the make, and model I could not begin to tell you; only that it was small. As I went around, I glanced over and behind the wheel was an equally aged gentleman with white hair and a chiseled face, a weathered and rugged elderly gentleman wearing a black suit. My first thought was that he was on his way to the funeral of one of his peers, or a family member, perhaps even his beloved wife.

            I continued around him and moved back into the lane, glancing in my rearview at the little oxidized red vehicle, I asked the Lord to bless and protect him. I steadily moved away from him and continued on my way, but the thought of him still intrigued me.

            It occurred to me that he might not be going anywhere special. He may just be dressed for his day. You see, there once was a time when people actually got dressed for their day. If they were going out in public, they put on nice clothes, a suit, casual wear or a dress that reflected their style. Even if they didn’t have a lot of money, they always managed to have at least one nice set of clothes.

            When I think about how people dress nowadays I cringe. I find the ‘Wal-Mart people’ photos more embarrassing than funny. I shake my head over people who think it’s okay to run to the store in their pajamas.

            I once saw a woman wearing fleece Tweety Bird pajama pants, an oversize t-shirt with some other kind of cartoon picture on it, and fuzzy pink slippers. She looked like she literally climbed out of bed and headed to the store. She was not running in for an item or two either, she had a full cart of groceries. Really? You thought your nightwear was appropriate attire for your weekly shopping trip?

            Just recently I saw a whole family shopping together, mom in her pink hearts pj’s, dads were covered in some food logo; and the kids, well, all three of them were dressed in jeans and sweaters or sweatshirts. I found it interesting that the kids knew how to get dressed but the parents didn’t, and it was a weekend, so they weren’t dressed for school.

            My own Mother, at 80, still got dressed to go to the store, even if it was just around the corner to pick up her medicines at the pharmacy. It might be a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt with some fun picture on it, but it certainly wouldn’t be her pj’s.

            What is this lack of care about? Why has our society decided that dressing appropriately for going out in public is no longer necessary? You wouldn’t wear your swimsuit to someone’s wedding, even if it were on the beach. You certainly wouldn’t show up to a job interview in the wet muddy clothes you just washed the dog in either. Well, maybe, if the job was for a dog washer.

Why do so many people find it appropriate to dress so sloppy? I don’t agree that poverty is the cause. I know too many people who live at or below the poverty level who still manage to dress appropriately when going out in public.

I truly think it is a lack of respect. A complete lack of respect not only for others but for themselves as well. At some time in their lives, they’ve been given the message that they are not worth the time it takes to put on decent, clean, and appropriate clothes for going out in public. They are not worthy of self-care, self-respect, or self-esteem. They are not worthy of respect from others, so why should they have respect for others, or themselves.

Who gave them this message? Who told them they are not worthy? I want to find the culprit and slap them silly. How dare they tell people they are unworthy of love and care, even of themselves. Who made them God?

When Jesus was asked which of all the Commandments was the most important, He broke them all down into just two,

“Love God with all that you are!”

“Love others as you would yourself!”

When you love something, you take care of it. When you love someone, you do things for that person to show them your love. When you love yourself, you take care of yourself, even if it means putting on real clothes when you go to the store.

 

 

 

Faith Struggles

            Ever since I was saved in 1989, I’ve had a problem with a couple scriptures that talk about becoming less of ourselves and more like Jesus: taking up our cross and following him. (Matthew 10:38 and 16:24; Luke 9:23 and 14:27.)

            I felt like I had to give up all my dreams, stop using my talents and gifts, and turn into a replica of Jesus. Why would God give me those dreams, talents, and gifts if He expected me to lay them down and become just like Jesus?

            I had struggled with this for so long that I just quit doing anything for fear of doing the wrong thing: something that wasn’t becoming like Jesus. That just served to make my anxiety over the whole idea worse, because now I wasn’t doing anything to serve God. I wasn’t becoming like Jesus; I wasn’t being myself either. I was hiding everything about myself, including my faith, to keep from doing the wrong thing - which was exactly the wrong thing to do.

            Fast forward a bunch of years in which I worked as a church secretary, taught kids on Wednesday nights, ran errands for members, worked on projects with members and other staff. When I left that job, I felt like my whole life ended. I never really felt like I was serving God, until I wasn’t. I had been serving God by serving the people of His Church. I just didn’t see it.

            Then one day while reading a devotional, I came across a verse. 1 John 4:8, of which the last line is…. God is Love.  A light went on in my heart. That’s it! God is love! Can it get any simpler than that?

            Jesus wasn’t telling us to literally turn into him but to follow what he does, and Jesus loves. He is the personification of the Love of God. He came to serve us by giving up his physical life for our salvation. That is a cross we no longer carry. The cross we are now required to carry is turning from everything that is not love and striving to become the same Love that Jesus demonstrated for us. 

God is love!

 He wants to empty us

 of all that is not love

so He can fill us with Himself!

My Favorite Holiday

The world loves holidays! Every culture on the planet has them, and for varied reasons.

We all know the big ones in this country and around the world, and some of the minor ones most of us don’t actually celebrate, but they are still on the calendar. If I had to pick one of the big ones as my favorite it would be Thanksgiving. However, none of the big ones or any of the minor ones is my favorite holiday.

My favorite holiday…..Birthdays!

Not just mine either. I celebrate everybody’s birthday. They are extra special holidays because they are YOUR day. Sure, a couple hundred-thousand people were born on the same day, but in your corner of the world, it is YOUR day!

I celebrate every birthday I know of with a card, a prayer, and a $1 bill. That $1 is to treat yourself to your favorite candy bar. Yes, you can still buy a candy bar for a dollar or less at the right stores.

Birthdays are a celebration of you, your years on the earth; how you’ve grown and changed, what you’ve learned, where your headed, and reaching for your dreams.

I assess myself on my birthday. How am I doing? Have I grown? What did I learn in the last year? Am I headed in the right direction? Are my dreams still alive or am I just existing day today? Am I still loving life, or has it turned ugly on me?

These are questions I ask myself often, but I dwell on them more deeply on my birthday. I want to make sure that another year has not whooshed by uneventfully, leaving me empty and dried up on the inside.

I love celebrating my birthday. It’s MY day….week….month! My favorite cake is carrot cake, but I also love ice cream cake; with my birthday being in August, ice cream cake is perfect. I love getting cards and displaying them all year on my bedroom wall. I look at all the cards I get during the entire year and smile at all the love I’ve received.

So, on your next birthday….celebrate YOU! For you are an awesome and wonderful creation. (Ps. 139:14)

I Was A Witness!

Yep, I was a witness. Not at a trial, an accident, a proposal, or even a big awesome event. I was a witness to an ARK. I’ve witnessed several small ARK’s in my current line of work, but this time was awesome. It brought tears to my eyes and warmth to my heart.

            A customer in my line was trying to buy some food and medicine with the last money she had on a Visa gift card. For some reason it wouldn’t let her make a debit purchase, so she went to the ATM in the store and was trying to get the cash off the card to pay for her purchase. It wasn’t a lot of money, a little over $20, but I think it was all she had.

            Waiting patiently in line were two older women, one riding in a handicap grocery cart, the other standing near her. As they watched this poor woman’s situation, they spoke softly to each other. The woman in the cart pointed to the monitor and her friend walked over and looked at the amount.  She then turned back to her friend and said, “I think we should.”

            So, the woman in the cart reached into her purse and pulled out the money to pay for the distraught woman’s purchase. As I completed the purchase the friend walked over to the ATM to tell the woman that her purchase was taken care of and even took her the bags. She was so stunned at first, she was speechless. When she finally found her voice, she choked out thank you as tears filled her eyes. She said it over and over as she collected her bags from the kind woman.

            This entire episode took less than 5 minutes, but the impact will last a lifetime.  I thanked them both for their generosity as I processed their purchases. The woman sitting in the motor cart just shrugged and said, “It’s just something we are called to do.”

            Oh, what a blessing to have found their calling!

6 Ways to Enjoy Your Shopping Trip

1. Start in the parking lot!

There are directional arrows and lined parking spaces to help you know which direction to drive. Use them to your advantage and you won’t have people giving you dirty looks. And, for those areas of the country that get snow, you may not be able to see the arrows, but cars are still parked in the usual direction you should travel. Not to mention the fact that, if you shop that store regularly, you should have the parking lot memorized by now. Oh yes, another little known fact, the speed limit in parking lots is 10 MPH. 

2. Entering, and exiting, the store!

Pay close attention to the doors as you walk up to the store. One door is clearly marked ENTER, the other, EXIT. Using the correct door for the direction you are headed will prevent accidents, like, getting hit head on by an overloaded buggy. You will also avoid those dirty looks I mentioned above, plus, other customers won’t think your illiterate. Also, as you enter, acknowledge other customers and employees who speaks to you. It's nice to feel welcome at the grocery store.

3. How to navigate aisles and the ‘Action Alley’! (That wide expanse between departments that display random promotions and sales that change weekly.)

Now the trick here is to treat those aisles like you would the road in your car. Keep to the right!  I know it sounds too simple, but it really does work. If possible, when entering an aisle, try to enter on the side where the item you’re after is located. If that’s not possible, stay to the right until the way is clear, then step across, get your item and quickly return to your buggy.

When coming to the end of an aisle treat it like you would a street corner, stop and look both ways before proceeding. This cuts down on buggy collisions, constant apologies for cutting people off, and those dirty looks as well.

4. How to treat other customers!

Simple, with respect! Remember the golden rule even when others don’t. Always say excuse me when walking in front of someone, wait your turn to get the same item as another customer, and don’t take all a product just because it’s on sale; only take what you need and leave some for others. Also, I know it’s awesome to run into friends and get to visit a bit, but please don’t stand in the middle of an aisle blocking other customers. Move out to the Action Alley and get between two displays where you won’t be blocking merchandise.

5. When you change your mind about purchasing an item!

If possible, return it to the place where you picked it up. Please, please, please, don’t just leave it where you are at the moment, especially if it’s a perishable food item. If you don’t have time to return it to its own spot, then please bring it to your checkout line and give it to the cashier. They will make sure it gets back to where it belongs. This will help cut down on clutter that makes the store look messy, and waste from spoilage as well.

6. At the checkout!

Here is another place where the golden rule should be applied. Cashiers are there to provide a service, help you purchase your groceries. They are not the complaint department; they don’t make store policy and cannot change it. They are following instructions from the corporate office when asking for ID, if you would like to apply for a credit card or donate to a charity. And yes, the money raised goes to the charity, not into corporate pockets.

It’s okay if you don’t like the self-check area, some people do, and that’s okay too. While I’m on that subject, this is an area where paying attention to signs is important. If the sign reads ‘Express Self Check’, that means you should have less than 20 items. The self-check area is not designed to accommodate a full buggy of groceries.

Now, if you’re picky about how your items are bagged you have 2 options: put them on the belt with similar items to be bagged together or offer to bag yourself. Please don’t throw, slam or pile you items onto the belt. It’s loud and rude, and it can damage the belt. Please leave heavy items in your cart. The cashiers have a wonderful tool called a scanning gun that we can bring to the cart.

Oh, one last thing, it’s okay if you bring your own bags. Stores are happy to use them for you because it saves on the cost of plastic bags, and it’s good for the environment too.

                                                            Have a great day!